Humans take time

We spend a lot of time talking when we pray. We ask for this and that, we spend some time asking God to help others, and then we start asking things either for ourselves or for our own curiosity. Sometimes we ask God questions about what we should do in our lives or what decisions we should make. Sometimes we wait to ask until the decision really needs to be made and we expect God to answer right then! We say that we believe that everything happens in God's time and it certainly does, but when we wait until the decision absolutely needs to be made to ask God what to do, we are not giving Him or ourselves time. Now God does not need time to process things like we do. He always knows what's going to happen and what decision needs to be made, but the "His timing" part comes in with His timing on when to tell us and sometimes it takes longer because we don't listen! One would imagine that when we ask God a question, we would listen for His answer, but that's not always true. We ask questions and wait for the answer we want, not necessarily the answer we need and when we don't get the answer we want, we stop listening. So God has to bring people and circumstances and whatnot to bring us back around to His way of thinking.

Time, humans take time. We are slow and oftentimes stupid creatures and when we deny God time in our lives, we deny Him the power to change our lives. Ecclesiastes 3 says there is a time for everything. A time to be born, to die, to plant, to uproot, to kill, to live, to cry, to laugh, to mourn, to dance, to search, to give up searching.... to sit down and shut up. We hear in our churches to go out and do, to not be afraid, to learn, to grow, to teach, to blah blah blah and there is nothing wrong with any of those things. But when in all of our going and doing are we spending any time with God? When in our ministry are we intentionally communing with the One who sent us out? Jesus hand chose his disciples intentionally, He taught the lessons that He intentionally at each time and each place. He didn't just throw stuff out there hoping that someone in the crowd would get it. He knew each ear that would hear, each mind that would process, and each hand that would rise in action based on His words. We of course cannot know all these things, we're human. But God can and if we spend time with Him, He wants to tell us. To be prepared is to know the Spirit of God in any given situation. Sometimes we honestly do not have that kind of time and that's why God is God and we are not. But God wants to tell you what He's planning, if we will only sit still long enough to listen.

What a weekend!

Okay, so here’s the scoop on what happened this weekend. This has already been an emotional week for me because I had to say goodbye to Jonesy (my foster brother of two years that is being adopted) last night and we had Genesis Prayer meeting last night too. But I digress….

Saturday morning, God woke me up at 4am and I knew that I needed to read my friend Lewis’s facebook (See, God does use facebook!). I got to his page and saw a status and a post that had been put up nearly an hour ago (3am). The status said, “Scum of the earth, refuse of the world, put on display at the end of the procession. Whipped, beaten, shipwrecked, stoned, jailed, burned, sawed in half, beheaded and crucified. Hungry, tired, lonely, crushed, mocked and doubted. Paul took the lash 195 times, Peter was nailed upside-down, John lost his head, Steven was crushed by rocks. The name of Jesus, properly spoken, should silence a room, if only for these.” Even though I wasn’t speaking out loud, my room went silent and it was… Supernatural.

I then read the post,

“Dear Sin Nature,

If I believe that the Bible is true (Romans 6-8), then you are SO DEAD.

YOU'RE DEADER THAN DEAD; YOU'RE SUPER-DEAD.

IF I have been born again, that is saved by the risen son of God, then you are DEAD.

DEAD MEANS NOT ALIVE, AKA NO LONGER ACTIVE OR VALID.

THANKS ANYWAY, GOOD TRY, BUT YOU = FAIL.

When I act as though you are still alive, I am gravely (haha, pun) mistaken. It’s like being in a jail cell that is unlocked. I am, in reality, not a prisoner anymore. The choice to function as one is mine, not yours, because you’re DEAD.

Yes, it is easier to do what I already know, but this is not what Jesus is asking me to do. I am being transformed, my mind is being renewed by the word of God and He is UNCONDITIONALLY committed to the process that makes me more like Him. Not you. You’re dead.

My most insincere regards to your rotting corpse, thanks for all the pain, doubt and suffering you caused,

Lewis Kleiner, new creature, alive in Christ.”

God used this to help me see that I was still standing in my cell, my prison, even though the door was wide open! It didn’t matter who made the prison, how it was formed, or why I stayed in it for so long; all that was forgiven and forgotten so that I could come out of it knowing that God led the way for me, all I had to do was follow Him. In the silence of my room, God held out His perfect hand to me and bid me to take it and let Him lead me out of my prison. It literally didn’t matter if I built the prison or if I just let myself be caught up in someone else’s prison, it was all forgiven and the door was flung open. I took His hand and wondered how I had stayed there for so long.

I processed this all weekend amidst all the things going on with Jonesy leaving and Keri and I looking for a new place to live… it’s been a busy weekend and this week is looking to be much the same. But God has been so good to me through it all, giving me extra strength for the day and then letting me rest at home, to play and talk with some beloved friends, and praise in church (can we just talk about how God spoke through the worship on Sunday? wow.) and letting me know that it’s okay that I’m still processing it even now! God knows that my brain has not caught up with my heart and it may not ever catch up, and that's okay. I don't need to be able to wrap my mind around what God has done in my life in order to accept it.

Last night, in prayer meeting, I'm sure we were supposed to be praying about something specific, but God had a grip on my heart and showed me in my mind's eye the cell that I have been living in. He showed me three solid walls and on open cage door. He walked into the cell, turned and looked at me with love shining out of His eyes, and then he raised His pierced hands and blew all four walls to pieces! Never again shall I live in that dirty cell when I can fly with Jesus!!

when i think about the Lord
how He saved me, how He raised me
how He filled me with the Holy Ghost
how He healed me to the uttermost
when i think about the Lord
how he picked me up
turned me around
how He set my feet
on solid ground

it makes me want to shout
hallelujah! thank you, Jesus!
Lord, you're worthy
of all the glory, and all the honor
and all the praise!
Hallelujah! thank you, Jesus!
Lord, you're worthy
of all the glory, and all the honor
and all the praise!

Phil 3:12-16
"Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. All of us who are mature should take such a view of things. And if on some point you think differently, that too God will make clear to you. Only let us live up to what we have already attained."

Questions? Comments?

This song won't leave me

Ancient Skies

by Michael Gungor Band

You have never changed
Your love is endless and Your mercy has remained
Through all the ages, You shine so bright
Nothing can compare
You made the heavens and Your glory fills the air
Through all the ages You ride the ancient skies

And You ride the ancient skies
You’re amazing
Creation cries, so will I

Now we stand amazed
And now we sing the word they sang in ancient days
A single word that’s overflowing endless praise
Hallelujah

Hallelujah…

Rab-Koach

Rab-Koach, "mighty power", is the name of God I learned today.

1 Chronicles 29:11-12 (New Living Translation)

Yours, O Lord, is the greatness, the power, the glory, the victory, and the majesty. Everything in the heavens and on earth is yours, O Lord, and this is your kingdom. We adore you as the one who is over all things. Wealth and honor come from you alone, for you rule over everything. Power and might are in your hand, and at your discretion people are made great and given strength.

Everything I think and do is so self-centered! I even praise God selfishly. I sing His glories, but I think how they relate back to ME and how I glory in them, and the many ways He shows His glory to ME. It's about God, but it's also about me. How can be totally self-less in my praise? How can I praise God without thinking of myself in any way? Can humans even do that? Is it even possible? Can I praise God without having an "I", "me", "us", and even a "them"?

God's power is mighty, yet we pay it no heed. We say with our words that God has all the power, but then we go out and try to control our lives and the lives of those around us. To be a true Christ-follower and a true leader of man takes a balance that many cannot achieve.

Father, help me understand Your power in a new way today. Help me see You in a new light, help me hear You speak to me clearly. Help me submit to Your leadership, to Your ultimate power.

God Loves You Enough to Say No

How many times have we been in the store or at the mall and have seen a child throw a temper tantrum because they didn’t get their way. Now, you know if a child does that in public, it’s because they think it will get them what they want because that’s how it works in private. Permissive parenting strikes again! Is God a permissive parent? I mean, He wants to bless us with all good things, but does that make Him “permissive”?

In the past month, God has been picking a theme a week and everything that’s been going on in my life has revolved around that theme. First it was motivation. What’s my motivation for obedience, prayer, and service? Second, it was my priorities. What are they and are they in accordance with God’s will? Third, it was His love. How am I an active participant in His love and how does He show me his love on a moment to moment basis? And this week, it’s Confession and denial. Given that this is only Wednesday, I can only imagine what this week is going to hold, but here’s what’s been going on so far, and seeing that it’s only Wednesday, I think it’s pretty huge!

1 John 1:5-10 (New Living Translation)

Living in the Light

⁵ This is the message we heard from Jesus and now declare to you: God is light, and there is no darkness in him at all. ⁶ So we are lying if we say we have fellowship with God but go on living in spiritual darkness; we are not practicing the truth. ⁷ But if we are living in the light, as God is in the light, then we have fellowship with each other, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, cleanses us from all sin. ⁸ If we claim we have no sin, we are only fooling ourselves and not living in the truth. ⁹ But if we confess our sins to him, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all wickedness. ¹⁰ If we claim we have not sinned, we are calling God a liar and showing that his word has no place in our hearts.

God is perfect light and in Him no darkness can live. He has shared a spot in that light for me so that I can abide with Him and never fear the darkness of the world. Yet there is darkness in me that cannot be in the light. The sin in me needs to be taken away, which He did on the cross, but I need to daily confess my sin, not to keep myself clean, but to continue in an open, honest relationship with Him. He knows my heart and mind better than I do, but much like the parent who knows which child broke the lamp, He wants me to come to Him with my sin so that I know He’s taken it away.

Confession as Freedom:

God is not a liar, and it not mocked. For us, on point of confession is our freedom, but it’s more than that because if we confess, we can be close to God, which is His desire. His faithfulness in cleansing us from our sin comes from His love for us and His desire to be close to us. Obedience to Him begins with confession, and living in the truth comes with that. Fellowship with each other also comes with confession, freedom with God and man.

Confession and Denial (God used Sam and Bible Study last night in a big way to help me see this correlation):

Genesis 3:1-7 (New Living Translation)

The Man and Woman Sin

¹ The serpent was the shrewdest of all the wild animals the Lord God had made. One day he asked the woman, “Did God really say you must not eat the fruit from any of the trees in the garden?” ² “Of course we may eat fruit from the trees in the garden,” the woman replied. ³ “It’s only the fruit from the tree in the middle of the garden that we are not allowed to eat. God said, ‘You must not eat it or even touch it; if you do, you will die.’” ⁴ “You won’t die!” the serpent replied to the woman. ⁵ “God knows that your eyes will be opened as soon as you eat it, and you will be like God, knowing both good and evil.” ⁶ The woman was convinced. She saw that the tree was beautiful and its fruit looked delicious, and she wanted the wisdom it would give her. So she took some of the fruit and ate it. Then she gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it, too. ⁷ At that moment their eyes were opened, and they suddenly felt shame at their nakedness. So they sewed fig leaves together to cover themselves.

Adam and Eve had it good in the garden, they had everything. Except one thing. One thing they were denied, though for good reason. When the serpent came to Eve, he didn’t point at the tree and say “God’s completely and totally wrong, eat it, you’ll be fine. God doesn’t even exist!” He knew that wouldn’t work because she knew that God existed in a very personal way, a way even more personal than you and I might know that God exists. Instead, Satan planted one seed of doubt and got her thinking about the one thing God said she couldn’t have. She went from being happy to be with God and have this perfect life, to being disappointed that she wasn’t God. She was denied this fruit by God, the one thing He said not to eat, and she wanted it! Notice how it didn’t take much convincing on Satan’s part to get her to eat the fruit. But when her eyes were opened, she realized that God said no for a reason, but it was too late.

Friends, God says no for a reason!

He loves us enough to not let us have everything we want, to keep us safe from hurting ourselves. Where does confession come into this? Tell Him. Tell God where in your life you feel denied and ask Him to help you deal with the fact that He tells you “no” because He loves you enough to keep you from all harm. Ask Him to show you how you try to fill that gap of what you feel you’ve been denied with things other than Him. Understanding God’s immense love for you is only the first step. Once you have a feel for His love, test it with confession, knowing that He will forgive you and, even better, heal you! Let Him show you your denial in your own life. What are you refusing to see about yourself?

Personally, and those of you that know me know this, I feel I have been denied a husband so I try to fill that gap with other things. But God has been showing me a better way, a better solution to this problem. Trusting in Him and His wisdom in my life; I’ve already proven that when it comes to my own life, I’m a terrible driver.

In what ways has God said “no” to you? Have you tried to fill that gap with other things? Have you confessed those other things with a true heart of repentance or are you just confessing to try to alleviate your own guilt? What is your motivation in repentance? How has this denial changed your view of God and how should God actually be viewed?

Remember: We are denied things for a good reason. God love you enough to say no!

Happy Valentine’s Day (or Singles Awareness Day as the case may be)!

Given that this is Valentine’s Day week, it’s only fitting we should all take a moment and talk, or at least think, about love. Personally, I like love. It’s a nice thing, a gift. I have many friends who are celebrating a “first” this Valentine’s Day; first V-Day being together, first one being engaged, the first one being married, and first one with a kid or two kids. It’s all very sweet and wonderful, but not what I’m going to talk about and not what God has been speaking to me about this week.

When I read the Bible for my daily devotional time, I read the same passage or chapter or whatever for five days and each day, God shows me something different, something that I hadn’t seen on the first, second, third, or fourth reading! It’s pretty amazing!

My passage this week is Ephesians 3:14-21 (New Living Translation):

(Paul’s Prayer for Spiritual Growth)

“¹⁴ When I think of all this, I fall to my knees and pray to the Father,¹⁵ the Creator of everything in heaven and on earth.¹⁶ I pray that from his glorious, unlimited resources he will empower you with inner strength through his Spirit. ¹⁷ Then Christ will make his home in your hearts as you trust in him. Your roots will grow down into God’s love and keep you strong. ¹⁸ And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is. ¹⁹ May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God.

²⁰ Now all glory to God, who is able, through his mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think. ²¹ Glory to him in the church and in Christ Jesus through all generations forever and ever! Amen.”

Here’s where God took me with this today (basically, I’m just going to copy these pages of my journal for you- note that this is written from God’s POV):

My love is:

-Wide enough to cover the breadth of your own experience and it reaches out to the whole world.

-Long enough to continue the length of our lives and long-suffering enough to put up with all your personal crap.

-High enough to rise to the heights of your celebration and elation.

-Deep enough to reach the depths of your discouragement, despair, and even your death.

Let My love act as a Quieter for your soul. Let Me quiet you in the midst of the storm, I am strong enough for you! Let My love be enough and you will never be disappointed in it. It’s human nature to want another person to be close to, I should know, I made you that way, but no other person can fill the gap in your heart that I created for Myself. I want to live in your heart, I want to make you strong so that you will be ready for the oncoming battle. Don’t you realize that without Me, you will not be able to stand? The thought of you falling brings tears to My eyes because I love you so much!

As you learn to trust Me, I will instill Myself in your heart all the more, I will shield your heart but only if you let Me. I can only move if you let me. This has nothing to do with My power and everything to do with your faith. I have more in store for you than you could ever dream! I have plans for you that would knock your socks off! And I want to tell you about them, but you must be ready! Fortify yourself with My love and you shall never ever fall where My love will not catch you.

I know there is so much more to learn from this passage, so much more that God can show me. I’m excited to learn more, to know more, to love more.

Happy Valentine’s Day (or Singles Awareness Day as the case may be)!!

The Awaited One

The Awaited One
by Max Lucado

We were a wreath of Light around the stable, a necklace of diamonds around the structure. Every angel had been called from his post for the coming, even Michael. None doubted God would, but none knew how He could, fulfill his promise.

I've heated the water!"

"No need to yell, Joseph I hear you fine."

Mary would have heard had Joseph whispered. The stable was even smaller than Joseph had imagined but the innkeeper was right- it was clean. I started to clear out the sheep and cow, but Michael stopped me. "The Father wants all of creation to witness the moment."

Mary cried out and gripped Joseph's arm with one hand and a feed trough with the other. The thrust in her abdomen lifted her back, and she leaned forward.

"Is it time?" Joseph asked.

She shot back a glance, and he had his answer.

Within moments the Awaited One was born. I was privileged to have a position close to the couple, only a step behind Michael. We both gazed into the wrinkled face of the infant. Joseph had placed hay in a feed trough, giving Jesus his first bed.

All of God was in the infant. Light encircled His face and radiated from His tiny hands. The very glory I had witnessed in His throne room now burst through His skin.

I felt we should sing but did not know what. We had no song. We had no verse. We had never seen the sight of God in a baby. When God had made a star, our words had roared. When He had delivered His servants, our tongues had flown with praise. Before His throne, our songs never ended. But what do you sing to God in a feed trough?

In that moment a wonderful thing happened. As we looked at the baby Jesus, the darkness lifted. Not the darkness of the night, but the darkness of the mystery. Heaven's enlightenment engulfed the legions.

Our minds were filled with the Truth we had never before known. We became aware for the first time of the Father's plan to rescue those who bear His name.

From An Angel's Story
(originally published as Cosmic Christmas)
Copyright (Thomas Nelson Publishers, 2002, 2004) Max Lucado

Part the Waters/ I need Thee Every Hour- Selah

This song is so clearly the cry of my heart that I come close to tears every single time I hear it, and I listen to it often. "I need Thee every hour, in joy or in pain! Come quickly and abide or life is vain!" These lyrics complete what my heart tries to begin to express in my worship. I need God so much that if He does not show up, my whole life really is worthless and in vain. All that I have worked for in my life, my friends, my family, and my education is all completely worthless without Him as the center and controller of it all.

Listen to this song, read the lyrics, pray the lyrics. Believe and watch God totally change your life as He did mine!

Part the Waters Lord/I Need Thee Every Hour - Selah

When I think I'm going under, part the waters, Lord
When I feel the waves around me, calm the sea
When I cry for help, oh, hear me
Lord and hold out Your hand
Touch my life
Still the raging storm in me
I need Thee every hour, most gracious Lord
No tender voice like Thine can peace afford

REFRAIN

I need Thee, O I need Thee
Every hour I need Thee
O bless me now, my Savior
I come to Thee

I need Thee every hour, in joy or pain
Come quickly and abide, or life is vain

REFRAIN