Friday, December 17, 2010

i am kate: Today.

i am kate: Today.: "Today I am cynical and restless. Today I want to curl up in a ball and weep my way through a bowl of ice cream. Today I wonder, 'How..."


Today I want to curl up in a ball and weep my way through a bowl of ice cream.

Today I wonder, "How did I get here...and when will it too, pass?"

Today I feel unattractive and inadequate.

Today I am honest.  Today I feel deeply.  Today I am lonely.

I pray that tomorrow brings peace, hope, and desire.

I pray that today is just that: only today.

From: i am kate

Thursday, December 16, 2010

The day a Hysterectomy sounds good....

The Day A Hysterectomy Sounds Good by Amy Cox

The day a hysterectomy sounds good
Is the twenty-four hour period each month
Where my uterus feels as though it is trying to expel itself from my body
And I am more than willing to stop the madness and have it all removed....
If it weren't for the mother in me
The one that rationalizes my wide midsection as the perfect childbearing hips
The one that longs to go lingerie shoppping, maternity clothes shopping, and eventually baby clothes shopping
To set up a nursery and spend hours rocking my tiny babe to sleep

But today,
Just like every month
The hormones rage,
The tears flow,
And I think,
There's always adoption

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Oh, Oswald Chambers, you're good.

"Be diligent to present yourself approved to God, a worker who does not need to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth." 2 Timothy 2:15

If you cannot express yourself well on each of your beliefs, work and study until you can. If you don’t, other people may miss out on the blessings that come from knowing the truth. Strive to re-express a truth of God to yourself clearly and understandably, and God will use that same explanation when you share it with someone else. But you must be willing to go through God’s winepress where the grapes are crushed. You must struggle, experiment, and rehearse your words to express God’s truth clearly. Then the time will come when that very expression will become God’s wine of strength to someone else. But if you are not diligent and say, “I’m not going to study and struggle to express this truth in my own words; I’ll just borrow my words from someone else,” then the words will be of no value to you or to others. Try to state to yourself what you believe to be the absolute truth of God, and you will be allowing God the opportunity to pass it on through you to someone else.

Always make it a practice to stir your own mind thoroughly to think through what you have easily believed. Your position is not really yours until you make it yours through suffering and study. The author or speaker from whom you learn the most is not the one who teaches you something you didn’t know before, but the one who helps you take a truth with which you have quietly struggled, give it expression, and speak it clearly and boldly.

Saturday, December 11, 2010

Introvert Spasm

An Introvert Spasm is when a person with an introverted personality suddenly cannot handle interaction with other human beings. It seems to happen suddenly, but this is deceiving. In fact, an introvert spasm takes time to build up in the introvert's system before is spasms out. While the introvert might not notice the symptoms of the building up process, it's been documented that after the introvert realizes what's happening, they can note the symptoms and be in a better position next time to avoid the complete spasming effect.

... until then.... I will continue to have my introvert spasm.